The Last Time
by leafyaki
Summary: Lenalee thought he was a girl, and had timidly asked if she could braid his hair, because it was just so pretty. Kanda/Lenalee, also suitable as friendship/gen fic.


**Title**: The Last Time

**Pairing**: Kanda/Lenalee

**Prompt**: A picnic, and someone confesses

**Summary**: When Lenalee was eight, all she wanted to do was to tie Kanda's hair.

**Notes**: This totally ran off without my permission, and I don't think there is an outright confession (with the totally weird interpretation of "confession" I used) at the end, but still, hope you enjoy (:

**Word Count**: 1,272 words

* * *

They met when Kanda was ten and Lenalee was eight.

Lenalee thought he was a girl, and had timidly asked if she could braid his hair, because it was just so pretty. Kanda would have cut her, but he realized she's a girl, and she looked scared, and he just did not hurt girls.

He snapped "I am a BOY" before storming off. Lenalee was left looking at his back, bewildered and scared and ready to cry again.

.

They met in the cafeteria a fair few times after that.

Lenalee would always look at his hair, but Kanda refused to let her touch it, despite how uncomfortable he felt from her gaze. There was always something more than childish glee and longing there, there was desperation, and a yearning.

She became his shadow for a while, following him everywhere. Kanda had told her a few times to stop it, but she never did, unwilling to let him out of her sight. The Finders thought it was cute, but they never said it out loud because even at ten, Kanda was a scary thing with his sword.

It went on for a while, until Kanda started getting more and more used to her following him. The few times she had to go unwillingly to train her Innocence, he relished the quiet and yet felt unnerved, looking around at the shadows in whatever room he was in, wondering if she was there. And when Lenalee came back he would look away with annoyance on his face, and she would look a little scared, but glad that he's there, not insisting she go away.

It was in February that one day when Lenalee blurted out:

"It's my birthday today."

Kanda stared at her, disbelieving, not knowing what she expected him to say. She took his silence as permission to go on.

"I…" She paused, and started again. "Please, could you let me tie your hair?" At the sight of Kanda starting to protest, she hurried on. "I promise, I will let it down afterwards, and, and, I won't hurt you!" She said, panicking slightly at the end. She lowered her head, her whole face red from embarrassment, looking scared, waiting for him to reject her.

Kanda gaped at her with his entire ten-year-old stupefied gaze, before taking in her posture. Her hand clenched into small fists, pressed onto her lap. Her expression shaky, determined, with a small sad smile playing on her lips.

It's been forever since she asked him that, and since she started following him around. It's been…and Kanda started as he realized it's been months since she started looking at him as some sort of an acquaintance maybe. Not friend, he didn't know what would make her think of him as a friend. But, it was her birthday…

He let out a small growl before barking:

"Ten minutes."

Instantly, Lenalee's face lit up and she scrambled forward, comb and hair ties and mirror at the ready. Kanda mentally groaned at the eager, almost fiendish look in her eyes. It was the first time he saw such an expression on her face. She was almost demure all the time.

For finally being allowed to touch his hair, Lenalee went very slowly, carefully brushing his hair to smoothen it out, and repeating the strokes evenly all around his head. After that, hesitating for the split second, she carefully separated it into two equal parts, her hands busying themselves with the left side first. Kanda nearly flinched at the gentle grasp she applied to it, eyeing the right hand that reached for a hair tie.

One round, and two, then repeating it on the other side.

She was slower on the right side, as if unwilling to let it end too soon. Kanda stared grumpily into the small mirror in front of him the whole time, mortified at the long ponytail hanging off the left side of his head. Lenalee kept going though, finally reaching for the last hair tie, finishing off the process by securing his right ponytail.

A long silence ensued after that, with Kanda unable to look into the mirror and Lenalee just staring at his head for a while, unmoving, touching her own hair where two similar ponytails lay. She trailed a hand through one of the ponytails unsteadily, her eyes unfocused. Kanda chanced a glance up and really did flinch this time from the utterly pained, desperate and resigned look on her face. She was not looking at him, but through him, eyes seeing a past, or perhaps a future, that must have been or will be better than the present they are living in.

Finally, shaking her head, Lenalee came back to the still room, hands reaching out to gently pull the hair ties down with a murmured "thank you".

Even after Lenalee left the room, hands shaking with a suppressed emotion, Kanda sat there for a long, long time.

.

She stopped following him after that, and started trying to escape.

.

She was ten. A manic, beret-wearing scientist barged into their lives and Kanda watched him smooth his hand down her hair, comforting her in the way that he could not.

It was too much to watch, especially when Lenalee refused to look at him as well, her eyes welling up in tears, too many tears.

.

They are now eighteen and sixteen respectively.

Lenalee's hair is now short, cropped, almost a crude bob-cut that would have looked unflattering on anyone besides her. On this rare sunny day, Lenalee managed to invite him for a picnic. He would have protested, but Lenalee would not take 'no' for an answer, and he did not need her following him around while Exorcists, Scientists and Finders alike watched on amused. It was just not worth the trouble.

It was a spread provided lovingly by Jeryy, and Lenalee had taken care to make sure none of the food items were too sweet.

Conversation did not come easily between them. Conversation never came easily between Kanda and anyone, so nobody should have been surprised, but Lenalee had always had a word or two for him, or was always able to carry on a one-sided conversation that she knew he would listen to, even if he did not make the appropriate responses.

Kanda was wondering what the point of all this was, carefully prepared food, a blanket they could sit on to avoid the wet grass, only him invited, Lenalee quiet the whole time when she put her sandwich down with a determined look on her face.

"I never did thank you," she murmured, Kanda's sharp ears picking up the words. "And…I never did apologize, either," she said, voice picking up in strength.

Kanda glanced at her, confused but not showing it. Lenalee smiled, picking at the grass, before speaking up again, eyes soft and smile gentle:

"It's my birthday today."

Lifting up her head, Lenalee looked straight into Kanda's eyes, smiling at how understanding dawned in his eyes. Always his eyes, never his face, to truly understand how he was feeling, and Lenalee knew that.

Grinning, she reached out to his hair, removing the hair tie with a firm downward pull. He gaped at her, even as she giggled and pulled out another hair tie, comb and a simple handheld mirror, preparing to receive her gift.

She was seventeen. This time, however, face flushed with embarrassment, Kanda looked into the mirror the whole time, into her eyes reflected in the mirror, and Lenalee laughed at the gruff, quiet growl he released, her laughter ringing loud and clear on that sunny afternoon.


End file.
